mindfirerunner

Like most evenings after dinner, I stood staring at my grocery list determining what I needed to get at the grocery store next (never mind I had already been once today…and twice on Sunday). I’m the lucky owner of two teenage boys and a toddler, a husband, a dog, and a very old cat. It’s a rare day that I actually DON’T go to the store. My list had two things on it, until I added the third and critically most important. I stood there laughing at myself as I was writing it, but I was ever so content. I had busted my tail on my run this morning, and trust me it doesn’t get any easier the older you get. I counted calories all freaking day long. So, when I got home I was more than happy to twist off the cap to the gigantuous bottle of Grand Marnier my husband bought me (oh, how he LOVES me). I watched with enchantment as the gorgeous liquid filled the beautiful round-bottomed glass I’d bought just for this special indulgence (I know it’s only Tuesday…don’t judge). My mouth began to turn upwards as I swirled the glass, taking a big inhale. I exhaled with contentment as I took my first sip. I pulled the bottle out of the cupboard (have I mentioned I LOVE my husband???) and noticed that there were just droplets left.

What? Oh no. The beautiful round-bottomed glass would be emptied far too soon. I savored each drink, trying to prolong the end of the gorgeous liquid. The world was circling around me; children eating dinner, dishes being done, laundry being changed, but I was a statue in time. A simple glass in my hand. A dream of early bedtime. A thought that my run tomorrow would feel as if I were an antelope, dancing through the fields of eastern Colorado.

And then, my phone rang. I answered to the voice of a generic male voice from the school calling me to remind me that “my student’s lunch balance was below $10”. I quickly hung up, sat back against the kitchen counter, swirled the gorgeous drink and inhaled again before taking another savory sip. The phone rang one more time, this time with a generic woman’s voice telling me that “my student’s lunch balance was below $10”. I get it. I get it. I turned my phone off, turned my attention to the 4-year-old who decided he was hungry for the third time this evening, and smiled in contentment.

It might have only been a 10 minute reprieve, but as I get older I realize it’s not about how many races I’ve finished, how many organic meals I make, or how hard I try to keep the house clean. It’s about those few minutes each day that I take to stop the world around me; to pause and see the blessings swirling around my world.

I’ll take every minute I have regardless of the chaos…4AM runs because of work and baseball, dinners standing up, rushing out of the house at 6:30 for work…because I know I’m having the time of my life.